Sometimes Mom says, "Panzer, you're a good boy."
The sickening truth is ... she's right.
No real cat would ever want to be a good boy.
But ... I am so afflicted.
It seems that some time ago, on a bright and sunny Druid holiday, I stepped in a patch of good-kitty-ness.
And ... got the stuff all over my beautiful black fur.
So ... I tried to lick it off ...
|Wow! That was good catnip.|
And ... contaminated my insides.
It was there at that precise moment ...
That ... I became a good boy ...
And have been tormented by it ever since.