A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on developing your cat's personality through games:

 

Let's try it and see.*

No, I don't want to play a game of chase the wadded up paper ball.

 

Now ...

 

A game of  ambush Mom's ankles might be kind of fun, though.

 

 

 

 

 

* From Cat Wisdom for humans 

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on how the brain works:

 

The brain is like a model of a real-life golf course.

 

You can just putter around ...

 

Or ...

 

You can allow yourself to go on long majestic drives ...

 

Did you get it?

Usually, though ...

 

I like to go over to the sand trap ...

 

And ...

 

Well ...

 

You know. 

National Black Cat Day

 

 

 

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on showing love:

 

I gave Mom a dead mouse today.

I left it on her pillow so she'd see it when she woke up.

 

Then ...

That really hurts*

She let What's His Name have it.

 

and ...

 

he threw it in the garbage can outside.

 

Human's just don't know the value of love gifts.

 

 

 

 

*From Cat Wisdom for humans 

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on theology:

 

I usually avoid controversy ...

 

but ...

 

I will say this: 

 

Only good dogs go to heaven ...

 

I can just see it right now.

All cats go to heaven ...

 

and ...

 

Pizza will be on the menu in heaven

 

Served by good dogs on roller skates. 

National Cat Day

 National Cat Day 2024

You may bow down before me now.

A Monday Panzerism

Even Mom is right once in a while.*

Panzer on choices:

 

Mom figured she could have a kitty

OR

a nice couch.

She made the right choice.

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on ways to save money:

Today, I heard Mom and What's His Name talking.

Mom said they need to save money for Christmas.

What's His Name said my cat food is the really expensive kind ...

and ...

she should change my cat food to the cheap stuff to save money.

Well ...

I know how What's His Name could save money.

I could catch him some spiders.*

I've heard bugs are a good source of protein.

Maybe ...

What's His Name needs to change his diet to save money.

* From Cat Wisdom for humans

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on true love:

Love conquers all ... including curtains.*

The only thing between me and true love is your window curtains.

And ...

No ...

I don't know why they are on the floor.

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

Cat Wisdom for Humans on Sale at Smashwords December 15 - January 1

 Cat Wisdom for Humans on Sale December 15 - January 1

 

 

I don't usually put Cat Wisdom for Humans on sale, but I did for Christmas this year. It's available at Smashwords only for this sale price. Be sure to check the price when you put it in your cart. Click HERE to buy.

Your Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on gift giving:

Mom's birthday is coming up soon

 

And ...

 

I've decided what her gift will be from me.

Everybody knows cats are not good cooks

Maybe a dead mouse instead this year?

Who always leave tornado-sized messes in the kitchen when we try.

So ...

This year I won't bake her a cake.

Hmm ... I think that's the same thing I gave her last year.

Your Monday Panzerism

 

He won't do that again.*

Panzer on return policies:

Mom ...

What's His Name bought the cheap cat food again.

Can we take him back to the Husband Store and get a better one?

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

Your Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on butterflies:

Yuk!*

Mom likes butterflies and so do I.

She likes their bright colors and so do I.

She likes the way they flutter around and so do I.

But it sure seems something that pretty should taste better.

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

Free Ebook At The Smashwords Store: Laugh Don't Cry, Life Is A Joke by Fiona L. Woods

 Free?Really? Wow! 

Free Until August 1

 

 In Laugh Don't Cry. Life Is A Joke you'll learn how Mom and Panzer became a team and what happened when What's His Name joined them. and then you'll meet some of Mom's relatives and friends.

 

You will need to set up an account with the store,

but you won't be chargedwhen you use the discount coupon SS 100 at checkout. Download Laugh Don't Cry Today 

Your Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on statistical analysis:

It's pretty easy to tell when information supplied as fact is incorrect.

Now take for example, Mom's statement, "The average cat sheds his body weight in loose hair each month."

Average? You maybe. Not me.*

Obviously ...

This is not true.

There is no such thing as an average cat ...

All cats are way, way above average.

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

Your Monday Panzerism

Why didn't I think of that?*

Panzer on hunting dogs:

Sounds like a good idea to me ...

but is it legal?

*From Cat Wisdom for human

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on cat philosophy:

And ... the food dish.*

A journey of a thousand miles ...

begins ...

with a single trip to the litter box.

* From Cat Wisdom for humans

Your Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on accessorizing:

Arrggh ... oh no ... arrggh ... coff.

I don't know. It fell off somewhere.*

What do you mean this collar with a bell looks good on me?

How would you know?

You're the one with a wardrobe that's perfect for radio.

 

 

 

 

*From Cat Wisdom for humans

Your Free Sunday Jigsaw Puzzle: What is that?

Hint

Here's your Sunday jigsaw puzzle.

As always remember at the puzzle site to click the square in the lower left corner to see the finished puzzle.

Have fun!

To do the puzzle tootle over to What is that?

A Monday Panzerism

 Panzer on jokes:

Pnazer: Knock. Knock.

Mom: Hmm?

Panzer: Knock. Knock.

Mom: Hmm? What?

Panzer: I say, Knock. Knock. And You say, Who's there?

Mom: Okay. Knock. Knock.

There's a first time for everything.*.

Panzer: Who's there?

Mom: It's me, Mom. You've known me your whole life, Panzer.

Panzer: What? Wait!  I mean, what? Hey! What happened?

*From Cat Wisdom for humans